Ever Inadvertently Tell Someone His Band Sucks?

A glass of water, evidently...

 

No.

 

After seeing Merzbow back in 1999 I commented to a fellow punter that I thought one of the opening acts had delivered a better set, not knowing that Merzbow mainman Masami Akita was right behind me. I don't know if he heard me, or even how good his English is for that matter, but it sure felt awkward.

 

I am certain current members of the band still calling itself "styx" are quite used to hearing that since their main guy is no longer part of the act.

I have numerous times had to walk on eggshells to NOT tell a band they suck. I have tried out for numerous bands that I have , after being offered the position, had to very tactfully decline. Having to resort to diplomacy sucks too........

 

When I was on Twitter...

I told Ed Droste of Grizzly Bear that their next release should have more dynamic range. No answer, of course.

Yeasayer made a big stink for attention before their last album came out, and were getting upset once the mixed reviews rolled in. They were being incessant about it so I replied that they should just make a better one next time. No answer, of course.

Neither was inadvertent, but they're only two instances I've made of direct critique to an artist.

 

I once saw "The Byrds" and in this particular incarnation the ONLY original member was Michael Clarke. Sort of long-time member Skip Battin was also in the line-up, along with a couple of way young dudes who sucked. Clarke looked like he was on the verge of a heart attack the entire performance. Battin just looked embarrassed. They were REAL BAD ... as in NOT GOOD. By the time "Eight Miles High" rolled around the entire audience was yelling, "YOU SUCK!" It was pretty sad. I think Crosby and the others ended up suing Clarke out of using the Byrds moniker due to the sheer suckiness of this sham tour. Same thing happened once when I saw "The Guess Who" and the only original member was the bass player. It was AWFUL! I don't mind musicians trying to make a living, but they do have an obligation not to SUCK!

 

Maybe the OP just showed that being diplomatic is always the best way to interact with people.

 

Sitting about half way back in the arena last Saturday by the third song I had to relieve myself. While in the bathroom there is a guy pissing & moaning how bad the band is and how this ain't his kinda music. Thinking fast I asked where he was sitting? Second row so I said if your leaving I'll gladly have your seat. He escorted me there and I enjoyed the rest of the Los Lobos set up close. He probably was comped the seats cause it was at a casino

 

And then Tommy went on to have serious alcohol problems. Smooth move, Ex-Lax!

 

Styx is one of the few bands I ever got backstage passes for. I believe it was the Cornerstone tour and they had Point Blank opening. I didn't get to talk to any of them at all. I just watched them go on to the stage and then come off from a side position near the stage. They were pretty good that night.

I saw them a 2nd time and it was one of the Texxas Jams (83, I believe) and they were doing the Kilroy Was Here tour and were flat awful. I've never seen them since (not because they were so bad, but my interests changed).

All things said: not a bad band looking at their discography, overall.

I've played in many bands that have opened for large acts, but never told anyone they sucked. I did walk in on Britny Fox changing once, and that was awkward. I think one guy was doing a Derek Smalls with the cucumber thing, but I cannot be certain .

 

Just curious, but why would you try out for a band that you thought sucked and would turn down the position for, anyway?

 

Numerous reasons. First of all you often have no clue a band sucks until you actually try to play with them. Sometimes a band can appear to be fairly good but be a royal pain in the ass to actually work with. Sometimes I have tried out for bands from just getting a phone call out of the blue from an agent or band member, not having heard them or knowing a thing about them. And then there are times I think " perhaps just having the right guitarist would help" or whatever instrument I happen to be trying out for.

An example is, I got a call to try out for a band about 8 months ago. I showed up with gear and tried out. The guys played just fine as far as having the ability and knowing songs. But they hadn't a clue about stage signals, all they could do was play songs they already knew note for note but could not play outside of that situation. the singer never looked at the other musicians when changes were happening in the songs, didn't clue the band that he was ready to come in and would just start singing where he thought he should no matter what everyone else was doing.
Which, sure, they could play the songs but were obviously still green and not seasoned well enough to be easy to work with.

 

what reaction did you get?

 

I was walking down the road with Reb Beach and Kip Winger getting some Dokken stuff signed by Reb (who was playing in Winger at the time) and Kip Winger said do you want me to sign anything and I said I don't have any Winger stuff coz I never really liked the band (oooops!) He laughed and said "oh so you were one of THOSE people!!" So basically I managed to tell both of them their band sucked!!!!

 

No, I would never say something like that at the concert. You never know who you are talking to.

 

Not directly. But I did introduce one of the main singers to a friend of mine, Yoko.

 

Back in the 80's when I drank a lot Yngwie Malmsteen got pissed off at me over asking him his opinions about other guitarists like Fripp and Andre Segovia. After he slammed his drink on the bar and started cursing at me in Viking I told him what I thought of him. Three bodyguards then got in my face and started threatening me. We took it outside but my useless "friends" got scared and fled. Outside, alone and in front of 50-100 bloodthirsty Yngwie fans I nonetheless soon realized that these hired goons weren't going to touch me unless I struck one of them first. I then proceeded to further berate Mr. Malmsteen and Joe Lynn Turner who were pacing back and forth behind the bodyguards throwing one of the funniest temper tantrums I've ever seen. Heck I even started asking the bodyguards if they have sex with Yngwie for pay. It's a miracle I wasn't killed that night!

 

A couple times. But, it was only local groups back in the 90's.

Called one supposed punk band "one-dimensional" and the other weak wannabe R&B as "pregnant teenager music".

 

well honest to god i think i recall once when i was meetin martin barre i was all: U GUYS WERE AWESOME!!!!!!!!!! and hes all: "awful"? and im all no AWESOME!!!!

 

I have a friend from school who plays keyboards and he played a tape of his band for me and I said "Who's singing?" in a tone that indicated that I didn't like person's voice. Turns out it was my friend, so I had to do a quick 180 but the damage was done. I didn't know he sang at all! This was years ago, we're still friends.

A bit off topic, but I've always wanted to tell this story here. One of the coolest experiences of my life is I got to go backstage at a Phish concert in Summer 1998. I was at the food table (ants were crawling all over the M&Ms--gross) and Trey walks up to get something and says "Hi" or whatever to me. He asks me who I am and I say "Just a fan from way back." And he says, "How long ago?" I say, I saw you play for free at my college one night. He asks me, "What college?" and I tell him. Turns out Phish played there a couple times after I graduated, or at least at the theatre downtown, so he's asking me questions all aimed at figuring out what night I was talking about. Finally he figures out the night and says, "Oh, that's the night everyone was over at the beer tent, and no one was paying attention to us." Oops! I inadvertently reminded the man of a bad night, all because of my need to impress him with my "I was there" fandom.

He was friendly to me anyway, but I totally figured out, in short order, that this is not some sort of mellow hippie-like dude who happens to be a great guitar player, and somehow got famous with his band. Nope, this is a man with talent who is driven to succeed. Go figure! Anyway, I got a picture with him, my brother, Mike Gordon and some other people. Unless something cooler happens to me in the meantime I'll have it superimposed on my gravestone or urn.

 

Dude, I gotta be honest with you. Much as I think musicians should be able to take constructive criticism and not be so thin skinned, if his gorillas had tied your ass in a knot you would have every bit deserved it.

 

Maybe. Maybe not. He started it. We were both drunk. Either way most people find the story amusing.

 

You got lucky

 

I didn't insult an artist, but I accidentally insulted a guy who was the manager of a major label artist and later watched old people insult the artist himself. I was staying at a hotel around 2007. It was very busy that night, probably sold out. While relaxing at the bar, I complimented the guy sitting next to me for wearing a Johnny Cash t shirt. We started talking about country music and regretfully, something caused me to start speaking negatively of modern country music and the Nasvhille scene. He said something about liking both the old stuff and the new stuff. The next morning, I came down to sit in the restaurant and have some breakfast. Most of the people eating breakfast were older, probably in their 70s and 80s. Most of them seemed to be from the east and northeast part of the U.S. Suddenly, one of the hotel guests walks in carrying an acoustic guitar and wearing a cowboy hat. His shirt was pink, stonewash jeans had rips in the fabric. The next thing we know, the singer is serenading us in the middle of the restaurant with an impromptu mini-concert. The old folks in the restaurant must not have been big fans of modern country music, because they started booing and shouting. A very aggressive woman yelled "shut up!" One of the old ladies at a table got up and stormed out, later returning with a hotel employee. The next thing we knew, the modern country singer was being escorted out of the restaurant. The guy who was wearing the Johnny Cash shirt the night before comes running up to the singer, grabbing his guitar and guiding him away from the populated area. That man who had the Johnny Cash shirt was the singer's manager! The singer was in town for some high profile event, a fundraiser or something. It wasn't a concert in town, but some type of radio appearance and some news interviews followed by an acoustic concert at the actual event. To protect the innocent and guilty alike, I won't say the artist's name.

On a positive note, I should add that not all of 'em are bad guys. I met Toby Keith through a mutual friend when Toby was recording some demos of songs he was considering. Toby is extremely down-to-earth and made us laugh very hard. Very warm-hearted and humble. What I found most interesting was that he is a big fan of The Beatles and draws inspiration from their music.

 

I once booed James Taylor at a benefit concert. I just didn't like him at the time, thought he was a d-bag. Do I feel guilty now ? A tiny bit, but I kinda feel like artists have to learn to take the bad with the good. After all, if 1 out of 1000 people out there like somebody's music, they can go platinum.