Funniest thing you ever saw on The Simpsons

Stu's friend: (holds up jacket) "Hey, Stu! You should get this."
Stu: "Disco Stu doesn't need to advertise."

 

Apologies for bombarding the thread but there are too many great Simpsons moments.

 

And the continuation...

 

I always liked this soliloquy from Homer:

Homer: (reading) "No matter what you tell your child to do, they will always do the opposite". Huh?
Homers Brain: Don't you get it, you've gotta use reverse psychology!
Homer: Oh, that sounds too complicated!
Homers Brain: Okay, don't use reverse psychology.
Homer: Alright I will!

--Geoff

 

I never really watched the show, but I distinctly remember one I happened to see where Homer was tripping on something and hallucinating, it was funny. I can't remember the details though. I'm sure you fans know the exact episode.

 

Could it be the Chili cook off episode?

 

That's it!!

 

“So, you don’t like the old time bikes, huh?”

 

My personal favorite. "Note to self. Don't Touch ANYTHING"

 

I like the extended cut

 

(Bart, who has sold his soul to Milhouse for five bucks, goes to Milhouse's in the middle of the night to try and get it back.)

Bart: "You traded my soul for POGS?"
Milhouse: "ALF pogs! Remember ALF? He's back! In POG form!"
Kirk: "Milhouse, give him back his soul! I've got work tomorrow!"

 

The Texas Cheesecake Depository! Be sure to try the Lone Gunman Special...

 

(Bart answers the door)
Man: Yeah, hi.... I got a special delivery for Homer Simpson.
Bart: That's me.
Man: (Punches Bart in the face.) Don't write no more letters to Mr. Sinatra.
(doorbell rings, Bart answers it)
Teenager: I got a special delivery for Homer Simpson.
Bart: Uh that's me.
Teenager: (Punches Bart in the face.) Stop stealing golf balls from the driving range!
(Doorbell rings)
Man: (Through door) Homer Simpson! I've got a, uh... special delivery for you.
Bart: Go away.
Man: If you do not open the door, Mr. Simpson, I cannot give you your... special delivery.
(Bart sees it's his animation cell he ordered.)
Man: Here's your special delivery.
Bart: Thanks...
Man: (Punches Bart in the face.) And that's for keeping me waiting.

 

Whenever someone - especially in this context, a German - apologizes for their poor ESL skills before going on to write text with perfect English grammar and syntax, I am reminded of this exchange from the episode "Burns Verkaufen der Kraftwerk".

Context: Burns has sold the power plant to efficient Germans and Homer is afraid his incompetence will get him fired.

Horst: Homer, could we have a word with you?
Homer: No.
Horst: I must have phrased that badly. My English is how you say...inelegant. I meant to say: may we have a brief, friendly chat?
Homer: No!
Horst: Once again I have failed. (Reading from a German-English phrasebook) We request the pleasure of your company for a free exchange of ideas.
Homer (Yelling): Noooooooo!

 

"I contend that those tourists were decapitated BEFORE they entered the Krustyland House of Knives"

 

Part of the exchanges re: Grand Funk Railroad were quoted earlier, but I suppose given the demographics around these parts few would consider it to be one of the funniest Simpsons bits - chances are it strikes too painfully close to home.

 

I loved the Helen Fielding episode with the Homage to Benny Hill

 

How about Krusty hosting the "Krusty Komedy Klassics" at the Apollo Theater?

 

Say what you will about GFR, but they at least had enough of a sense of humor to include this quote in the liner notes for their live "Bosnia" album.