Patrick Stewart is "Poop" ("The Emoji Movie")*

They will make a movie about anything now.

"Jan. 19 (UPI) — English actor Patrick Stewart is headed for The Emoji Movie.

The 76-year-old Star Trek and X-Men icon will voice the Poop Emoji in the new animated film, Sony Pictures confirmed on its official Twitter page Wednesday.

“So excited to announce the distinguished @SirPatStew as Poop in the #EmojiMovie – in theaters August 4th! #SonyAnimationDay,” the company wrote.

Sony Pictures Animation had announced the news at an upcoming features presentation the same day, according to The Hollywood Reporter. Other new voices include Jennifer Coolidge as Mary Meh and Maya Rudolph as Smiler, a smiley emoji.

The Emoji Movie will star T.J. Miller as Gene, an emoji capable of multiple expressions, with Ilana Glazer as Jailbreak, a codebreaker emoji, James Corden as Hi-Five, a hand emoji, and Steven Wright as Mel Meh, Gene’s dad. Tony Leondis will direct.

“Emoji are expected to be one thing their whole lives. So I thought, what if one was born with not one, but lots of expressions … and how would that affect the status quo?” Leondis said at the presentation. “Everyone has felt different — it’s everyone’s story.”

The Emoji Movie opens in theaters Aug. 4. Stewart will also star in Wilde Wedding with Glenn Close and John Malkovich, and reprise Professor X, in the Wolverine movie Logan starring Hugh Jackman."

 

There is nothing about this story that is not sad and pathetic.

(I intend that emoji satirically)

 

make it so.

 

Make it go?

 

Who cares about dignity when you can get paid?

 

..also includes a Ron Jeremy cameo as the eggplant emoji.

 

Coming soon (NSFW):

 

I think it's fairly obvious this is going to be a self-aware, tongue in cheek thing like The Lego Movie, that both kids and adults can enjoy on different levels, and not some kind of sincere attempt to make a dramatic film about emojis.

 

Don't you mean Sir Patrick Stewart?

 

Hollywood is running out of ideas.

 

Erm. No thanks. But I do love the idea of him being in the movie though!

 

He's taking the piss!

 

Winnie The Poop?

 

A friendly reminder to everyone that this is all for the money.

 

As opposed to what??

 

Paddy Poop?

 

Who did Piglet see sitting in the toilet. poo!

 

The movie.

 

Did Sir Patrick Stewart beat out Mr. Hankey for the role?

 

Well, the more successful actors that don't *need* to take *any and every* paycheck do at least from time to time take actual gigs they like and that sound interesting and worthwhile.

I don't know how wealthy Patrick Stewart is (does he get any significant residuals from Star Trek: TNG?), but he's a pretty regularly working actor.

So while even super wealthy actors tend to at least sometimes take extra gigs because more money is never too much, I would have thought in the past that Patrick Stewart had some level of vested interest in his gravitas as an actor.

I'm sure he sees this is another subversive, ironic role, and I'm sure *all* actors LOOOOOVE these voice-over gigs where they can go to the friggin' studio in their pajamas and drink coffee and just read the lines.

 

He will no doubt be the best thing in the movie.

 

What would you find in the Enterprise's lavatory?

Number One and the Captain's log.