Junior year, one of my best friends in high school started working at the nearby two-screen cinema. Blazing Saddles played there all summer long, and his big trick at parties was, being able to recite the entire movie accurately. Until he stopped getting invited to parties. Then he went to work at the pharmacy, and his social life picked back up again (this is no joke)(well, in hindsight, turns out to be). Me, I only needed one from Jaws, modified endlessly: "We're gonna need a bigger (________)".
I used this one today! People usually have no idea what I'm talking about. If someone says something "vanished" I immediately say or think "like an old oak table...". ------- From Blackadder (script at BlackAdder Scripts: Blackadder II, Episode 6, Chains ): Q: There's definitely been no sign of Edmund. P: I fear not, Ma'am. Q: Why (??) he vanished? Simply vanished... P: Like an old oak table... Q: *Vanished*, Lord Percy -- not *varnished*. P: Forgive me, My Lady, but my Uncle Bertram's old oak table completely vanished. 'Twas on the night of the great Stepney fire. And on that same terrible night, his house and all his other things completely vanished too. So did he, in fact. It was a most perplexing mystery. Q: Lord Percy? P: Yes? Q: It's up to you: either you can shut up, or you can have your head cut off. P: (squints, thinks very long and hard about it) I'll shut up.
On occasion when my sister is watching TV and I don't know what is on, I'll quote one of the rats from Chicken Run when he asks the hens, "what's this caper love?" as they're attempting to fly.
"Then make a deal!" "What kind of a deal?""A deal-deal!" "Maybe the guy's a republican." Crapgame (Don Rickles), "Kelly's Heroes" I use that "deal-deal" fairly often; and occasionally, "maybe the guy's a republican."
I sometimes quote the following when I'm criticized about my grammar or sentence flow and structure in online forums... "When you work with words, words are your work"... Don Knotts' Luther Heggs' character who is a typesetter for the local newspaper in "The Ghost And Mr. Chicken" movie. There's another quote from this movie I've often been compelled to yell out at my small town's city council meetings during public input (complaints) session which is... "Attaboy, Luther!"...For those familiar with this movie there's an interesting little backstory on who yells this out throughout the movie.
I use this all the time. I can’t help myself. From Steve Allen; one of his two Funny Fone Calls LPs (culled from his late night Westinghouse shows): Go into a store. Salesperson asks, “can I help you?” I say, “I need to find a (blank) in the worst way. And this IS the worst way.”
Ironically he had a Jewish wife and family. “Hey Wang, I think this club is restricted so dont tell them your Jewish”.
"First, I wish to be the all-being, master of time, space and dimension. Then I want to go to Europe." Steve Martin, on setting priorities. I use this in meetings from time to time.
My wife always says to be careful to whomever is leaving the house. On occasion, I respond with the Chief Dan George quote from Little Big Man: "Today is a good day to die." Doug
When told that his daughter couldn't use the pool at a restricted club, Groucho Marx pointed out that she was only half-Jewish so she should be allowed to at least go in up to her knees.
When anything goes wrong, or especially if it tastes bad....... “Crumby Buttons”. Dick Van Dyke Show.
"Always with the negative waves Moriarty!" Donald Sutherland, "Kelly's Heroes" "Have a little faith baby, have a little faith." Donald Sutherland, "Kelly's Heroes" "Woof woof!" Donald Sutherland, "Kelly's Heroes"
Another of mine is also Groucho's. It turns out it is a way of life for me. This is how I know the line, "Any club that would have me as a member I don't want to be part of".
"I would never join a club that would have somebody like me as a member." Yep, one of my faves as well. There was a period where my friends and I constantly recycled the snappy lines from Animal House: "Do you mind if we dance with your dates?" "We should be..." "LEAVING, yes!" "Zero-point-zero." "Nice tie! Is that a clip-on?" "Excuse me, pardon me, excuse me, pardon me." Animal House is one of those films that has about 150 memorable and quotable lines... some of which are not great in mixed company or with P.C. spectators. There's another 100 very funny, quotable lines from The Jerk: "Another stupid, random bastard!" "He hates these cans!" "The new phone book's here, the new phone book's here!" "Damn these glasses!" "I DAMN THEE!" "Oh, I get it -- it's a PROFIT deal!" OK, maybe not that obscure, but these are 40-year-old movies now.
I work at a Country Club so not only do I know Caddyshack, I use lines from it liberally. No, I read it in the bolor supplement. Mine is... "I've had a wonderful time, but this wasn't it"
Why it's "The Quiet Man" of course..... Love this Movie I use "Hurry it up" and "Thanks" all the time
Hey you win! Congratulations. Yes, one of my favorite movies. I really do use all of these quotes every so often. In fact, I've got to go right now because... "Me throat, me throat's gone dry!"
From Seinfeld episodes. "That's a shame."...(say it to myself witnessing any random minor accident like someone dropping their iPhone down a storm drain). And "WHO is this?" when telemarketers call, saying it with Jerry's exact tone and delivery.
“You know, you remind me of my niece, Sally. She’s a dietician. Hey, would you like to buy a monkey?” David Letterman, Cabin Boy
Used when we're out drinking : "We serve hard liquor for men who want to get drunk fast. And we don't need any characters around to give the place "atmosphere"..." Sheldon Leonard to Jimmy Stewart "It's a Wonderful Life"
