SH Spotlight A few angry (but sort of funny) notes people sent me about my mastering work, imagined defects.....

Discussion in 'Music Corner' started by Steve Hoffman, Dec 2, 2013.

  1. culabula

    culabula Unread author.

    Belfast, Ireland
    There was also a glitch on the first batch of Another Self Portrait (Copper Kettle) -replaced.

    Also, Dylan's Complete Album Collection had a glitch on Hard Rain -also replaced.
  2. Arnold_Layne

    Arnold_Layne Forum Resident

    Waldorf, MD USA
    Steve I'll take all those defective DCC albums off your hands. I'll make sure they are disposed of properly :)
  3. The Pinhead

    The Pinhead SUDACA ROÑOSO

    Sorry but what are those 2 dark stains on the edges of the CD ?
    Grant and Tuco like this.
  4. Roland Stone

    Roland Stone Offending Member

    Working at a college bookstore:

    A customer comes in around mid-terms, to return a textbook. He not only wants to return the book but register a serious complaint.

    "I'm flunking Spanish and it's the bookstore's fault! You guys sold me the wrong book."

    Now it's possible a freshman would need an Elementary, Accelerated, or Intermediate book, so getting the wrong book isn't out of the question, but you think he would have noticed after the first homework assignment.

    Me: "Okay, let's exchange the book for the right one. Who's your instructor?"

    He doesn't remember. Yeesh. Go to class much?

    Me: "Okay, is your professor a man or a woman?"

    It's a woman. The teachers of Elementary and Accelerated are, by coincidence, all men. So he's enrolled in Intermediate. I grab that book. "This look right?"

    "No! See, this is what I'm talking about. You guys have all the wrong books. I need the book everyone else has."

    Me: "If we stocked the wrong book, I don't think this would be the first time I hear about it. What class are you in: Elementary, Accelerated or Intermediate?"

    Him: "Elementary. Absolute beginner. Everyone else has the right book."

    I'm at my wit's end. "What color is the book?"

    Him: "Green!"

    Green? Hmm, the possible first year Spanish books are orange, burgundy and white, respectively. Green, green, green? Suddenly it dawns on me.

    I walk to another textbook gondola and yank a book off the shelf and hold it up: "Is this the book?"

    "Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's it."

    I walk it to the counter and slap it down harder than necessary. I grit my teeth so as not to yell at him. "You're taking French," I inform him.
    Last edited: Feb 26, 2017
  5. The Pinhead

    The Pinhead SUDACA ROÑOSO

    Was he in the football team ?:laugh:
    qwerty, vonwegen, MoonPool and 2 others like this.
  6. pizzaland

    pizzaland Well-Known Member

    The best one so far this year: "This LP is defective - only the first few seconds of every track will play."
  7. Steve Hoffman

    Steve Hoffman Your host Your Host Thread Starter

    Umm, a shadow.
    Kkfan, CrazyCatz and The Pinhead like this.
  8. Steve,
    These Retro Mean Tweets R priceless!
    Thanks for sharing & thanks for the forum.
  9. Joseph LeVie

    Joseph LeVie Forum Resident

    South Florida
    I remember someone coming into Tracks to return a LaserDisc with a pinwheel of scratches from the edge to the center. He told us that the hole in the center was too large and the record wobbled too much to play correctly. At the time, LPs were mostly phased out and it would have been outrageous to pay $30 for one, but, the price, the fact that the product was a movie and that the signage declaring "LaserDiscs" all over the bin apparently did not tip him off.
    Johnny Reb, DTK, Kkfan and 5 others like this.
  10. Plan9

    Plan9 Mastering Engineer

    Toulouse, France
    WTF happened there? :laugh:
  11. Steve Hoffman

    Steve Hoffman Your host Your Host Thread Starter

    "Not loud enough" is the most common complaint I get. I need to start brickwalling.
  12. Plan9

    Plan9 Mastering Engineer

    Toulouse, France
    When I get complains, it's either that or "not bright enough"...
  13. Steve Hoffman

    Steve Hoffman Your host Your Host Thread Starter

    Some complainers accuse me of adding bass. It throws their "loudness button" into disarray.

    That's so funny, they don't realize that most mastering engineers shave off most of the bass for a lean sound. I never add bass, but I'm very careful not to kill it for the sake of "detail."

    There is a guy who makes cables who follows me on Twitter (and who I don't know from Adam) who constantly says this, if I post anything about anything whatsoever. Every time. For example, I post "I don't understand why the school system is (blah blah).

    And he answers

    "u mean the way u sometimes bump the bass and crush the treble when u remaster Hoff?"

    This is a guy who is trying to sell his audiophile wire. Can't figure out what his problem is. I never crush anything, I never bump anything. In his mind, I'm the ruination of his business or something. People are odd.
    ToneLa, snkcube, Ken K and 14 others like this.
  14. John Buchanan

    John Buchanan I'm just a headphone kind of fellow. Mysphere 3.2.

    That's what I like about SH remastering - honest bass and upper midrange/lower treble that isn't exaggerated so the vocals won't slice your eardrums. Perfect example - the Creedence catalogue on CD - the AP set vs the last digipak Fantasy set - no contest.
    snkcube, showtaper, vonwegen and 2 others like this.
  15. teag

    teag Forum Resident

    Maybe his audiophile wire "can't handle the truth "!
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  16. BradOlson

    BradOlson Country/Christian Music Maven

    Now that is horrible. I would rather have you do your thing and forget about the complaints.
    vonwegen likes this.
  17. John Buchanan

    John Buchanan I'm just a headphone kind of fellow. Mysphere 3.2.

    "u mean the way u sometimes bump the bass and crush the treble when u remaster Hoff?"
    The treble is all there - it's not bumped and, as SH said, the bass isn't crushed either. I hope his cables don't sound like his listening preferences.
    Dondy, vonwegen and BackScratcher like this.
  18. VinylRob

    VinylRob Forum Resident

    Well, it's always something, isn't it?

    I feel your pain. Funny sure, but it leaves me with even a dimmer view of humanity.

    Funny enough, sounds about like the excuses I used to get at the record store for returns of vinyl, except of course, surface noise issues in addition. It was generally the same cast of characters on a tirade that the man and the system we're taking them to the cleaners by selling them faulty music reproductions...

    As a sidenote: because most of those records were going to be scrapped anyway, I'd take them home and put them on my Sondek LP12, AND remarkably, most of them played and sounded just fine. Go figure.
  19. Grant

    Grant In holiday HELL

    United States
    I get this kind of crap all the time at my job!
  20. Grant

    Grant In holiday HELL

    United States
    You ever think your life would be easier if you just did what "everyone else" did?:D
  21. andyinstal

    andyinstal Runner for Others

    Allen, Texas
    an angry customer brought back a Steely Dan CD that was not in a jewel case, and was so scratched it was a cat toy, yelling in the store that he wanted his money back. No receipt, no proof he bought it at our store, or anywhere. My manager at the time was told by his boss to go ahead and give they guy a refund. I couldn't believe it. Rewarding a douche.
    Drifter, vonwegen and Grant like this.
  22. pizzaland

    pizzaland Well-Known Member

    I buy for a 30 store indie chain. Sadly, some of our employees do not understand that a vinyl LP (unlike a compact disc) could NEVER do this. Many times, customers have legitimate beefs about vinyl pressings (wrong discs, mislabeled LPs, poor pressings with "pockmarks," etc.) This time, one of our associates accepted a return for a vinyl LP when they should not have.

    I would like to note that I have been in the prerecorded music business since 1969 and have worked in retail and wholesale (indie distributors and major labels). In the 1970s, we never saw the defective rates we see these days (OK, there were those Dynaflex LPs). Nowadays, we get damaged and/or defective pressings about 5% of the time. Partly this is due to the carriers (despite specially designed shipping cartons, we still get bent corners and split jackets), but at times the strain of meeting production schedules shows in the defective pressings we also see.
    Plan9 likes this.
  23. Guitarded

    Guitarded Forum Resident

    Worked in a Cajun Joint for a Summer.

    Had a guy return a bowl of Gumbo because:

    "This is too watery. "

    G - 'It's Soup'

    "The last time I had this, here, I ate it with a fork!"
  24. Guitarded

    Guitarded Forum Resident


    Oh, they're the worst.
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  25. Grant

    Grant In holiday HELL

    United States
    That's why customers act the way they do: companies reward them for their bad tempers, so the message they have learned is that you can get anything you want by intimidation and anger.

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