How do men feel when their wives veto a purchase?

Discussion in 'Audio Hardware' started by HiFiTweeter, Jun 1, 2020.

  1. HiFiTweeter

    HiFiTweeter Well-Known Member Thread Starter

    I am trying to sell a pair of speakers so that I could upgrade. A couple fellows were ready to go when their respective wives would not allow the purchase. Never having been married, I wonder how the husbands feel. Quiet? Dejected? Resentful? Brooding? Withhold, or turtled for any sexytime? Hasn’t had any lately, anyway?

    One of my sisters in law would not even have a pair of speakers, an amp and a CD player in the living room and disapproves of a nice new car. They don’t do very shabby. To be fair, she does not buy extravagant things for herself either and dresses pretty conservatively. She hits inanimate things with her beater car too and I wish she would buy a new one for safety’s sake. My brother bought a pretty nice Audi but it was used. My other sister in law lets my other brother have anything he wants and he has thousands of bucks invested in diecast buses - nice ones. They don’t do very shabby either. She is a bargain hunter.

    On the other end of the spectrum, a fellow was advertising his Rega Planar 3 on eBay. In the ad, he mentioned his wife said, “What did you buy that for? Why don’t just get what you want?” He wound getting a Planar 8. I could not help but message him how lucky he is.

    Thanks for letting me vent because I’m pretty hot to sell my speakers and am pretty disappointed myself. I feel for those two fellows too. More often than not, wives and audio do not mix. My audio guy told me a story where a wife stormed into his shop and told him under no circumstances would she allow those speakers (too big). End of conversation. Another anecdote: a lady walked into my audio guy, heard the speakers and was convinced. She liked them so much she would not have anything else.

    Apologies in advance for any offense and let the moderator take this post down if he/she objects to the sexytime thing. I could find no other category to write this anecdote.

    What do you think?

    Stay safe :D
    Last edited: Jun 1, 2020
    yodog and dubious title like this.
  2. Anj

    Anj Well-Known Member

    Adelaide SA
    Ha interesting topic and can't wait to hear the various replies. For me (and I have made some big choices as have always been upgrading either my high end dj set up over 20 plus years and then moved to a separate hi fi set up too) but is about give and take and just keep the motto "happy wife happy life" which means if she wants to buy something i go along and get my next purchase on the quiet until it arrives :laugh:
  3. The Dragon

    The Dragon Forum Resident

    Madison, AL
    I think she needs to get kicked to the curb. I spoil her rotten. She does not get a vote for a nice clean music hobby. She is welcome to enjoy it with me, but she will not be denying me the fulfillment I get from this hobby.
  4. Strat-Mangler

    Strat-Mangler Personal Survival Daily Record-Breaker

    OP, you're assuming the would-be buyers were being truthful when they simply could've used that as an excuse not to pull the trigger.
    yodog, Kevin j, tumpux and 17 others like this.
  5. Michael

    Michael I LOVE WIDE S-T-E-R-E-O!

    LOL, geez that's sad...
    I have a wonderful wife who would never question anything I do in my collecting ventures...a gem I tell you! : ) and I love her so.
  6. HiFiTweeter

    HiFiTweeter Well-Known Member Thread Starter

    Its quite possible, but 2 in a row and they sure didn’t sound that way.
    RunningWithScissors likes this.
  7. lonelysea

    lonelysea Drunk Posting Never

    Twin Peaks, WA
    How do men feel? They don’t feel, that’s why they’re men!
  8. Tullman

    Tullman Senior Member

    Boston MA
    I was thinking the same thing. They got cold feet and used the old my wife won’t let me buy excuse.
    matthewp, somnar, Stereo68 and 5 others like this.
  9. StuJM84

    StuJM84 Forum Resident

    Kent, UK
    I'll let you know when it happens.

    Neither my wife nor I veto, or plan to, any purchases. If we can afford it and it doesn't negatively effect our lifestyle or stop bills being paid then its ok. Its not like either of us spend big during the months though and any large purchases usually come after months of saving.
  10. tayside

    tayside Active Member

    Agreed. I have a system going with my wife that new purchases of audio gear are funded from sales of audio gear and this is (mostly ) very efficient.
    She understands that this is my lifelong hobby and so long as I don't do anything absolutely crazy there is never a problem.
    Being 100% honest she has far better hearing than I do and although she has no particular interest in audio gear, she does like some music now and then. When I buy something new and am undecided, I often ask her opinion and I have never known her to be wrong about the SQ of anything I bring to the house.
  11. chipcalzada

    chipcalzada Forum Resident

    There is a saying: it is easier to ask for forgiveness than permission...
  12. johnnybrum

    johnnybrum Forum Resident

    From Come Clean (1931)

    nytechy, Phil147, Boden9 and 7 others like this.
  13. enfield

    enfield Forum Resident

    Essex UK
    If the purchase is coming out of your own personal money pot,then a little white lie to the actual cost of the speakers would suffice.If the money is coming out of a joint account then you need your wife's ok.
  14. talkingh

    talkingh Vibes Controller

    my girlfriend loves my (our) set up...her biggest complaint is normally..."not enough bass"
  15. jacden

    jacden Forum Resident

    My girlfriend never vetoes anything, and neither do I. We often play the devil's advocate to each other though, which has saved both of us from making foolish investments many times. If I get the upgrade urge, we talk it through. If we can afford it and and she can tell it's a genuine wish on my part and not just a spur-of-the-moment crazy fixation, she's always supportive.
    adamos, Sneezyachew, Phil147 and 6 others like this.
  16. Wally Swift

    Wally Swift Yo-Yoing where I will...

    Brooklyn New York
    My wife knows that if she interferes with this hobby I'll start chasing other women half my age for fun instead. So she's cool with it. :cool:
    Sneaky Pete, yodog, Garthb and 9 others like this.
  17. Dennis Metz

    Dennis Metz Born In A Motor City!

    Fonthill, Ontario
    Sometimes the wife is right :cheers:
    yodog, Matt Starr, somnar and 6 others like this.
  18. eric777

    eric777 Astral Projectionist

    I guess it all depends on the man. Not all of them will feel the same way.
  19. razerx

    razerx Who me?

    The East
    If your wife goes and buy a $4000 hand bag I am sure many audiophiles will find that objectionable. Whether or not a handbag or some cable is worth the bucks realistically only depends on whether you can afford it. If what you buy to feed your hobby is mere disposable cash then there will be peace in the family.
    RONENRAY and Bananas&blow like this.
  20. Agreed. I’ve had this when trying to sell a sports car.
  21. Subagent

    Subagent All I know is What I Read in the Liner Notes

    Arlington, VA
    Marriage is complicated in its dynamic. But also very simple. Who knows how decisions are made? That's the complicated part. The simple part is a "yes," or "no" as regards any question of action. I doubt there is anything universal beyond that that can be gleaned by a second party in a failed transaction with one half of a marriage.
  22. Tim 2


    Alberta Canada
    My wife trusts my choices as I do hers, never a problem.
    Although I think many use there wife as an excuse to back away from a deal. If I'm selling something and someone brings up their wife I know it's all over.
  23. Ontheone

    Ontheone Poorly Understood Member

    For the past 10 years I've found my musical life (let's be honest, entire life) is much happier and far more simplified without a wife ;-) Far fewer steps in the household "Kaizen" process of quality and efficiency.
  24. gibby299

    gibby299 Forum Resident

    My wife does not really get why I need any new gear as it "sound good" now. I do not get why a wall needs a different colour or why more throw cushions are needed. So we agree to disagree. Never a real issue. Her main complaint is playing around for speaker set up/vibration control experiments. She thinks I'm nuts.

    All is good though.
  25. Defdum&blind

    Defdum&blind Forum Resident

    My ex was a big music fan and enjoyed listening with me. She appreciated my audio gear and I often referred to her judgment when I would compare different pressings in regards to sound quality. As all the hardware buying was out of my pocket where the records and CDs were bought individually so there was no objection to getting something new into a system that had a tuner, CD player, DVD player, laserdisc, turntable, phono stage, pre amp, power amp, reel to reel tape deck and a large screen TV.
    Her only complaint was about the amount of remote controls that had to be used. So I went out without her knowledge and bought a universal remote for her/us to use. I explained how if you want to listen to any specific source all you needed to do was press a specific button and the universal remote would turn off the other sources and power up the pre amp and/or TV so she could listen or view at her leisure.
    She went ballistic! To her it just meant another remote control. So we didn't use it.
    yodog, shug4476, Matt Starr and 2 others like this.

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