Not as bad as “Billy Mack is a detective down in Texas You know he knows just exactly what the facts is He ain't gonna let those two escape justice He makes his livin' off of the people's taxes” That isn’t so bad that it would have been rejected from ‘The Beach Boys Love You”
Wiggle Wiggle Written by: Bob Dylan Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle like a gypsy queen Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle all dressed in green Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle ’til the moon is blue Wiggle ’til the moon sees you Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle in your boots and shoes Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, you got nothing to lose Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle like a swarm of bees Wiggle on your hands and knees Wiggle to the front, wiggle to the rear Wiggle ’til you wiggle right out of here Wiggle ’til it opens, wiggle ’til it shuts Wiggle ’til it bites, wiggle ’til it cuts Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle like a bowl of soup Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle like a rolling hoop Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle like a ton of lead Wiggle—you can raise the dead Wiggle ’til you’re high, wiggle ’til you’re higher Wiggle ’til you vomit fire Wiggle ’til it whispers, wiggle ’til it hums Wiggle ’til it answers, wiggle ’til it comes Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle like satin and silk Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle like a pail of milk Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, rattle and shake Wiggle like a big fat snake Copyright © 1990 by Special Rider Music
Everytime I hear this crap on the radio I have a feeling this is the most cringeworthy song of all time.
In the book I Hate Myself And Want To Die by Tom Reynolds ("Captain Jack" by Billy Joel is one of the 52 songs mentioned), he says that Joel is embarrassed by the song but he still performs it because it was his first hit song. The Story Song Podcast did a detailed analysis of this song (it's very funny). One thing they mentioned is the line "I've been to Georgia and Califormia..." and wondered why is that so impressive? You can drive from Georgia to California in a day or two, and you don't even need a passport.
This needs to be used in a Viagra commercial. EDIT: Ah, I see someone made this joke on the previous page. I guess it was too obvious to not be made!
Still, for me, the lyrics can be so doofy that they get in the way. Like, I love "Supersonic", but that verse about Ilsa and her Alka-Seltzer makes me cringe.
Works for me, and even if it doesn't it's translated from Portuguese so it gets a pass. All of Bossa Nova is a soft swaying 'aaah'. Some of y'all can't tell the difference between just a little awkward and something truly awful or between not as deep as they think it is and really dumb. Perspective and proportion people!
Don't worry. "Genius" in this case means "so it was a fraud all the time, thank you for letting us know".
A lot of Elton's early songs had dumb/ignorant lyrics. I'm a big fan of Elton/Bernie but they had this western fetish and just got a lot of stuff wrong. "Two men, lyin' dead as nails, on an East Virginia farm..." Come on, guys. Get a map. There are many other examples. Just makes you cringe.
I don't know if it's the worst ever, but I don't think Dylan has ever done worse than "Now the beach is deserted except for some kelp." If "kelp" was his best rhyme he should have given up on "help" and tried a synonym.
How about "He said hey fat fella with the hair colored yella..." Who the hell would EVER say that!!??
I thought the lyrics were "hey little fella with the hair colored yella" and I thought that song was pretty good!
I was made for lovin' you baby You were made for lovin' me I can't get enough of you baby Can you get enough of me? Yes. Yes I can.
Ow oh, hey you, who said that? Baby, how you been? You say you don't know oh oh, you won't know until you begin.
Everybody need reverse polarity. An angular mass of New Yorkers. A companion, unobtrusive, plays that song that's so elusive...
As noted in Post #276 at the top of this page, it's hard to find an artist with a bunch of hits, whose lyrics are as consistently cringe-worthy as Steve Miller.
